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Rather Be

by Brittany Myers

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Hassles
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Hassles Brittany's voice is wonderful, her vocal style is equally wonderful accompanied by a diverse array of oft sombre or sparse musical arrangements (courtesy of Hicks Canyon Band) within the realms of contemporary / indie / indie folk with "blurred borders". Often moody, this material will both impress and carry you away.
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1.
Standing on the corner of Manchester, I hear your tears fall louder as you convince yourself to go Thought I warned you this could be a problem Don’t seem to want what I have after I beat it to the ground You have begged me to take you higher And I’ve only low places that I like to call my own This is what I told you would happen Isn’t this what I said I’d do? And if you knew just what you were getting yourself into Why do I feel like the devil to you? Why do I feel like the devil to you? Shuffling my steps I leave you behind Never meant me to feel like this but I guess you don’t mind That bite cut deep straight through the flesh Held you bleeding on my shoulder while you cried “give it a rest!” I have begged you, “just give me a reason” But you’re too damn stubborn and too damn lonely to care This is what you told me would happen Isn’t this what you said you’d do? And if I knew just what I was getting myself into Why do I feel like a disease to you? Why do I feel like a disease to you? This is what we knew would happen Isn’t this what we said we’d do? And if we knew just what we were getting ourselves into Why do we hurt as much as we do? Why do we hurt as much as we do?
2.
Rather Be 03:57
Never felt more alone in a city of strangers Shuffling my steps trying to be somebody new My shadow gets so lonely it keeps begging for some company Of past familiar faces and a father I once knew So if you find my battling my grief Or if you see me falling to my knees Or if you notice me trying not to say “I was wrong” Darling I’ve got no fight left in me Darling I’ve got no fight left in me Drinking so much whiskey can’t remember when I was sober Got no one to keep me warm except the feeling of this bottle Keep my mind off things I miss like the family I can’t grab hold of Carry on further down the tracks hoping this will soon be over So if you find my battling my grief Or if you see me falling to my knees Or if you notice me trying not to say “I was wrong” Darling I’ve got no fight left in me Darling I’ve got no fight left in me So maybe I’ll be wrestling my grief And sure I might fall to my knees And maybe I’ll start to think that this was all wrong Cause darling you’re right where I’d rather be You’re right where I’d rather be
3.
First Degree 03:06
I was lying on your bed You were slipping on your shoes And I swore to god that this would be the end Well my father ain’t no preacher I wasn’t raised up in a church But if there’s a hell that’s where I’m headed I should’ve known better than that I shouldn’t have knocked upon your door Now here I lie bleeding on these cheap bed sheets Wishing I could take it back I was crawling on my knees Begging you to leave her side But you didn’t even glance in my direction They say you hurt the ones you love But doesn’t murder seem too much? Cause now I’m dragging my own body to the grave I should’ve known better than that I shouldn’t have wasted all that time Now here I lie bleeding on these cheap bed sheets Wishing I could take it back I was lying on your bed You were slipping off your shoes I knew just what I was getting myself into
4.
Guilty 03:07
Pull at my skin Make me feel something more than what I’m stuck in Tear out the lonely Take me to bed Not the kind I’m used to but the kind that makes me forget The one I left I’m tired of living so thoughtlessly Every step that I take leaves a crime scene And I’m the only guilty one I’m the only guilty one Am I the only guilty one? Turn down the bed Pull the covers round tight, don’t forget the lights I’d rather not see this happen I’ll wash off my sins Guess I feel more alive the faster I’m drowning In what I wish I never did I’m tired of living so recklessly Every step I retrace is a crime scene And I’m the only guilty one I’m the only guilty one Am I the only guilty one?
5.
You’re coming in late now Honey what’d you think I’d say? You’re wearing that smile Like a lie drawn across your face I can hear you when you’re crying Thinking I’m not awake I can see your light is dying Brace yourself another day And you say “It won’t let me be, it’s gonna find me, Oh now can’t you see it looks just like me It’s in my bones.” The tables they’ve been turning This ain’t a place you want to stay Don’t want to find you with a lighter Throwing gasoline in your way Your breath smells of cigarettes I know you weren’t where you say You can lock it up or write it off But that won’t make it go away And you say “It won’t let me be, it’s gonna find me, Oh now can’t you see it looks just like me It’s in my bones.” Oh oh oh oh oh it’s got a hold of you Oh oh oh oh oh there’s nothing I can do It’s in your bones And you say “It won’t let me be, it’s gonna find me, Oh now can’t you see it looks just like me It’s in my bones.”
6.
Bluebird 04:23
I’ve got too much on my mind To keep these folks from hearing Burning the midnight oil Wax melting from the ceiling How do I get to where I’m going If I’m stuck right where I’m at? How do I get to where I’m going If I can barely handle that? There’s a bluebird down inside of me And he’s dying to get out There’s a bluebird down inside of me But I push him down These prison walls are barren and untrue The bars they grow with time And it’s hard to keep me breathing When my sentence is for life So lock me in the gallows Let the darkness sleep by me And those demons in the corner Can drain these broken wings There’s a bluebird down inside of me And he’s dying to get out There’s a bluebird down inside of me But I push him down
7.
Throw down the gauntlet Your torch has long burnt out Hide all you demons Before the devil knows I’m dead Bury my body Somewhere it won’t haunt you Leave me dead roses Just to save the passing time But this water won’t turn to wine The ocean won’t divide Yet you say “darling, an eye for an eye” Tear out the sutures Rip the ghost right out of you Bleeding on the pavement Revenge controls your mind Reflection in the mirror Your father stares back at you Swore you wouldn’t be him My god what have you done What have you done? But this water won’t turn to wine The ocean won’t divide Yet you say “darling, an eye for an eye”
8.
Wanderer 03:34
I’ve been staring down this barrel Trying to find the answer near the bottom I’ve been walking down the interstate Throwing myself at the cars And I’ve tried breathing above water If only these fishbowl dreams would let me I’ve been rolling in the bed of too many strangers Pretending I’m a ghost of what they really need But I’m a tourist in my own home I’m a vagabond with nowhere to go I’m a gypsy traveling these empty streets Trying to find somewhere to rest my feet I’m a wanderer I’ve gotten so good at forgetting my past But the future is nipping at my toes And it seems that the second my feet touch new ground they’re running Running from the regrets that are two steps behind I’ve been waking from these nightmares Clutching my fists and screaming for my life I’ve been making the same mistakes over and over Thinking maybe this time it will be what I need But I’m a tourist in my own home I’m a vagabond with nowhere to go I’m a gypsy traveling these empty streets Trying to find somewhere to rest my feet I’m a wanderer
9.
Can't Stand 03:11
Dishes in the sink, old coffee in the pot You’re yelling my name from our bedroom “Where’d you put the keys, did you take out the dog?” I can’t stand the sound of your voice at all I read the paper, you get bored I try to talk, you interrupt Honey let’s address the issue I kiss your cheek, you pull away I call him up, you call her babe Maybe we should just admit that We aren’t happy anymore The covers pulled down low, you’re wearing old gym clothes When’s the last time that we did it? I sleep out on the couch, until your lights go out The tv holds me closer than you could I play a song, you act annoyed You buy me flowers, then they die We can’t even keep a plant alive I saw her name inside your phone You saw his pictures I am sure Let’s not act oblivious when We aren’t happy anymore It’s been so long, I can’t stop loving you It’s been so long, I’ve fallen out Now I can’t stand you anymore No I can’t stand you anymore
10.
Well Wisher 03:49
Throw me down the well To fight for the coins that I once threw The pennies always seem to add up But the wishes never do Maybe I will find that breathing is much easier without you Or maybe I will find that I only know myself when I’m around you So I’ll call you when I get there But I won’t be looking back No I won’t be looking back So I’ll call you when I get there But I’m never coming back It’s been so long now That you’ve held me in your sunshine arms But I’ve been stuck there for so long The body I’m inside can’t feel no one Maybe I will find that the trees are much greener without you Or maybe I will find there’s no reason to exist if I don’t have you So I’ll call you when I get there But I won’t be looking back No I won’t be looking back So I’ll call you when I get there But I’m never coming back So I’ll call you, or I’ll write you And I’ll tell you how I miss you And I’ll lie to you, if you ask me to And I’ll tell you that I’ll come back to you So I’ll call you when I get there But I won’t be looking back No I won’t be looking back So I’ll call you when I get there But I’m never coming back
11.
Noah 04:04
I guess that it’s Tuesday I’ll try not to call you When you’re not alone I’ve got a lot for sale But nobody’s buying The cheap love I sell The shop on the corner Stays open past midnight I’ll find my friends there Buschmills in a bottle A cheap smoke or vodka Anything not to care Anything not to I once had hope but it drowned in that old flood Begged Noah to pick me up He said “You’re not one of us, We’re leaving you behind” Now that it’s Wednesday My head’s kind of blurry What did I say? These moments of weakness I try not to call you But we all make mistakes Maybe if I just leave here I’ll start my life over Where no one knows my name But even the rain pouring down on this mountain Won’t cleanse me of you today I once had hope but it drowned in that old flood Begged Noah to pick me up He said “You’re not one of us, We’re leaving you behind”
12.
Golden One 04:15
I threw a whisper into the wind Hoping it would find its way home It took up shape into someone That I did hardly know Where’d you go my wayward friend? I’ve been searching for your ghost In the hills where you ran With the wind in your hair So long my golden one So long weary love So long lonesome I’ll see you again I sing your name on every corner Hoping not to forget it Your memories are restless dreams Struggling, fighting to breathe So travel fast and make it quick I don’t want to feel the pain That comes with leaving and losing you All over again So long my golden one So long weary love So long lonesome I’ll see you again

about

First full length album funded with the help of Kickstarter. And the Hicks Canyon Band!

credits

released June 23, 2014

All songs written by Brittany Myers. Copyright 2014.
All songs performed by Brittany Myers and the Hicks Canyon Band

Guitar/vocals - Brittany Myers
Guitar/vocals/piano - Spencer Hannemann
Guitar/vocals/piano/organ/bass - Jonathan O'Brien
Guitar/bass/piano - Brandon Osorio
Drums/percussion/vibraphone - Alex Teubert
Violin - Nehemiah Chen

Mixed and produced by Jonathan O'Brien at the Music Box Studios in Tustin, CA

Mastered by Michael Fossenkemper at Turtle Tone Studios in Manhattan, NY

Art and design by Brittany Arita

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Brittany Myers Seattle, Washington

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